When its time to change OBs

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As with all people, we will be human and make mistakes.  I made the mistake of picking an OB based on hours only. 

Yes sure I am a first time mom and rightfully confused by what I should do in order to accomodate my needs as a pregnant woman. 

By choosing my doctor based on hours I didnt interview him, I just started seeing him flat out without warning of his personality or moods.  I am so remorseful of this.

On no uncertain terms should your doctor start in on you about your weight within seconds of meeting you and being so rude as to tell you that gaining weight is not acceptable for you.  Sure there are women that gain little to no substantial weight while pregnant but they are not the norm.  You will gain some weight and you will not be thrilled about it.  And it will cause you more emotional stress to have a doctor tell you that you are too fat already and you need to not eat, go to a nutritionist, join a gym, jog, and get a personal trainer. 

Not all of us are able to be Angelina Jolie with her overly perfect little body.  Some of us deal with more and more stress as we get more pregnant.  Thus creating a larger weight gain especially if you are used to gaining when you are stressed.  I'm not an expert on pregnancy weight gain but know what it is like to be OBESE.  I was obese and was grossly overweight for more than 7 years.  I was sick and had the beginnings of heart problems when I was 25.  I beat that issue and had to accept that my body wants to be big while pregnant.  It feels the need to over compensate for this poor baby. 

So once you feel as though your doctor and you just dont see eye to eye or you feel under attack for something you are doing that he just doesn't like about you, it is time to look elsewhere.    This is already a very delicate time in your life and you are really supposed to be respected and treated well by the person who will be there while you deliver this new life into the world.  I understand that the doctor is concerned with the development of both the baby and your chances of gestational diabetes or pre-eclampsia but to disrespect you and cause a rise in blood pressure each office visit is outrageous.

Only 2-5% of women develop either gestational diabetes – which can be controlled through proper diet and exercise – or pre-eclamsia – which although possibly deadly to both mom and baby – are both more rare than common.

I understand that many women who will read this blog are of advanced maternal age and will either be considered high risk or in need of better monitoring which means a slightly more BRASH OB but if that is the case then look for a doula. These are wonderful woman who will assist you emotionally and physically when you are both in and before labor. 

However, if you are not considered high risk, consider all alternatives, not just an OB.  Looking into midwife services.  Many will work in hospitals and will assist you all the way through as a regular OB would. 

Just keep in mind that this is YOUR pregnancy NOT theirs.

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